Tree-Man Lift. EOD Traditions

Indian Head, Maryland 1985

The US Navy is full of traditions, it is one of the things that makes it the best navy in the world…its long-standing heritage and traditions. The EOD community is no exception, it has its many traditions, most of them written in blood. Some are not so old, nor written in blood; however, they are still part of our community.

One of the favorite things for EOD people to do to “wannabes” (those wanting to be EOD) is to play jokes on them.  One of the favorites is the “Three Man Lift”.   I am embarrassed to say that I fell for this one.

It happened during the “end of phase party” at Demolition phase in Indian Head.  We were all playing volleyball, drinking and having a good time, when Senior Chief Jack Hufty, who was probably one of the smallest EOD techs, came up to me and said: “I wonder if I still have it?”  “Have what, Senior Chief?” I responded, taking the bait.

“I used to be able to lift three guys at the same time, I don’t know if I can still do it”

“Senior Chief-I responded-there is no way in hell that YOU can lift three men”.  At this point everyone in on the joke started their bets, some saying that he didn’t have it, some saying “Come on Senior Chief, do it, try it!”

Captain Knipple-the Division Officer-came over to try to give the Chief some “pointers” and encouragement, yeah right!  Superchicken (Hufty’s nickname) told me to choose any other two guys that I wanted, which I obliged by choosing the two biggest guys in my class, which only played into the joke. 

So, feeling sure of myself, I laid down, in the middle, with my classmates holding me on each side, to the point that I couldn’t move or get out even if I wanted.  Jack straddled me and grabbed me by the belt, making some convincing gestures, trying to find a center of balance or who knows what.  He said he was going to count to three and then lift up.  During all of this “acting” I kept telling him that it was physically impossible for him to even lift me up by myself: HOOK, LINE AND SINKER!!

He repositioned himself on top of me, ONE, TWO and THREE!  All the bottles of ketchup, mustard, salsa, mayonnaise, beer, cokes, and anything else handy came spilling and penetrating into my pants while Jack lifted my belt, thus creating a nice entry hole for all of this junk!  It is not a good feeling having all of that stuff in your crotch.  Everyone had a good laugh on my account and I was indoctrinated in the ways of drunk EOD techs.